‘IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM, IF NO ONE ELSE CAN HELP …’
Twenty-four days. It doesn’t sound like much, does it? But Thomas Tuchel has informed his England players that’s how much time they have to work together before next year’s World Cup. Hence, for readers of a certain vintage and fittingly for a tournament across the pond, there will be a strong A-Team vibe to the next 16 months, beginning with Friday’s qualifier against Albania at Wembley. Can Tuchel and his coaching team lock themselves away in a barn and weld together " target="_blank" class="link"> an improvised assault vehicle capable of winning the final, on 19 July 2026, in the space of 24 days? Instead of Templeton Peck and BA Baracus, Tuchel will work alongside Anthony Barry, Nicolas Mayer and Henrique Hilário.
We don’t know how much experience they have of randomly bolting machine guns on to cars, but it has been established that Barry, Tuchel’s No 2, once sifted through footage of 16,154 throw-ins in his hunger to find a tactical edge. Tuchel himself boasts the gravitas and charisma of Hannibal, combined with a relentless tactical obsession, laser-like attention to detail and a suitably-accomplished coaching CV. While the German credits Pep Guardiola as a major influence, Barry is said to be an authority on second balls and knockdowns, music to the ears of any England fan who believes Sam Allardyce was the greatest manager the country (almost) never had. How many recoveries in the final third will be feasible in the searing heat of a North American summer? Let’s “cross that bridge when we are at the river,” Tuchel tooted.
Of course, working on the assumption that England will qualify demonstrates quintessential English arrogance. But taken together Serbia, Albania, Latvia and Andorra don’t constitute the most intimidating adversaries in Group K. The Three Lions are unlikely to need a playoff against the Netherlands, as they did in failing to qualify for USA 94, just as Tuchel is unlikely to watch a tape of that encounter for tactical inspiration. Graham Taylor’s cry of “That’s good enough!” after Tony Dorigo hacked the ball in the general direction of the Dutch goal exemplifies the level of tactical expertise he brought, and how much things have changed. Compare and contrast with Tuchel, who requires that every pass should be played to a teammate’s preferred foot.
Anyway, there is a growing sense that he is the right man at the right time, after last week’s first squad selection, combined with the new-term enthusiasm of his players. But no plan survives first contact with the enemy so we will know a little more after 90 minutes against Albania. And always lurking somewhere beneath the surface is the fear – or the hope, for all the haterz – that the temperamental Tuchel will spontaneously combust at some point, pushed beyond boiling point by an intrusive hack or one too many passes to the incorrect foot. Gareth Southgate said this week that trophies are not the only marker of success, an idea emphatically proved by the manner in which Tuchel’s predecessor transformed the culture in the squad, revolutionised external perceptions and generally brought the good times back to England. Time is short but thanks to Southgate, there are no fires to put out, and the objective is clear. Perhaps 24 days will be just enough for a plan to come together.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Join Scott Murray from 7.45pm GMT for hot Nations League clockwatch updates, including the quarter-finals, plus Greece v Scotland.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“I’m getting used to being a centre-forward, fighting with the centre-backs, them hitting you from behind. You’re always at a disadvantage and they like to mark their territory, intimidate you physically. They want to ensure you’re uncomfortable and don’t have space, from first minute to last – even if the ball’s not there. It’s more mental than midfield because it’s a more direct duel. But I’m adapting and if there’s one thing I’ve always been it’s a battler: I like the contact, I never back down” – Arsenal’s emergency No 9, Mikel Merino, gets his chat on with Sid Lowe about that new role, Spain and facing Real Madrid.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
Re: yesterday’s Football Daily letters. I too was pleased to see Alan Hansen looking well when collecting his MBE at Windsor Castle. I was worried he might turn up in a full Liverpool strip, but thankfully he was in suit and tie: he knows you can’t win anything with kits” – Kevin Carter.
Of the lessons learned from Manchester City Women putting an end to Chelsea’s 31-game unbeaten streak, foremost is: ‘The Miedema is the message’” – Peter Oh.
Send letters to [email protected]. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day winner is … Kevin Carter. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we have them, can be viewed here.
RECOMMENDED LISTENING
Get your ears around the latest Football Weekly Extra pod: Max Rushden is joined by Jonathan Wilson, Lars Sivertsen and Jordan Jarrett-Bryan for a chinwag about the latest new era for England.
EIGHTH SAMURAI (BLUE)
The first of our 48 lucky entrants heading to the 2026 World Cup are … Japan. Yes, while most European teams haven’t even kicked a ball in anger, Samurai Blue are already off to Mexico, Canada and the USA USA USA, a 2-0 victory over Bahrain booking their eighth consecutive appearance at the finals. “I’m relieved that we could qualify at home in front of our supporters,” cooed Takefusa Kubo, before he and his teammates addressed fans in Saitama and doused coach Hajime Moriyasu with water. Fellow goalscorer Daichi Kamada added: “We didn’t think it would go as smoothly as this but the players have put in a lot of effort. We know this isn’t normal and we had a lot of trouble qualifying last time. We’re relieved and happy.”
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
Australia are a good-sized step closer to the 2026 World Cup after recovering from a flamin’ shaky early start to thrash Indonesia 5-1.
A shiny and lucrative new seven-a-side global women’s series has been announced. It’s understood there is a commitment to invest $100m (£77m) in “World Sevens Football”, with the first event scheduled for Portugal in May.
One in, one out? The League Cup is at risk of being scrapped as part of the planned revamp of the women’s professional game.
After 31 games this season, Chelsea have … lost? “It will be difficult, but nothing is impossible,” roared Sonia Bompastor, having watched her team go down for the very first time this season, 2-0 at Manchester City, in the first leg of their Women’s Big Cup quarter-final.
Lee Carsley still has ambitions to take charge of England’s senior side again after his interim spell last year. “I tried to be myself, tried to do my best and enjoyed it,” he shrugged. “I didn’t enjoy it at times, but I enjoyed the majority.”
Chelsea are no closer to signing a new keeper, but have conjured £62.5m for Sporting’s Geovany Quenda and Dário Essugo. The Portuguese pair will join in the summer. And the club are also hopeful that Cole Palmer will make a swift return to action despite a second scan on his hamstring-twang.
And can you tweet something like … Gateshead FC have been linked with a potential takeover involving former Sunderland striker Victor Anichebe.
STILL WANT MORE?
Chelsea are no longer invincible this season after their Women’s Big Cup defeat and it turns out Vivianne Miedema is still pretty good at scoring goals. Tom Garry breaks down Manchester City’s European win.
World Sevens Football: who will be taking part and how will it work? Tom also has the lowdown on this.
Barney Ronay reckons Thomas Tuchel’s first task is to solve England’s main problem: Harry Kane.
Kane, Ronaldo and 16,154 throw-ins – Ben Fisher breaks down the making of Anthony Barry as Tuchel’s No 2.
Quiz! Quiz!! Quiz!!! Which teammate was first to join these Premier League goal celebrations?
“Our country is under threat, under attack.” Celtic and Canada’s Alistair Johnston sits down for a big ol’ chat with Joe Callaghan on football, politics and “the biggest fish bowl in all of Europe”.
Suzanne Wrack, meanwhile, has been talking to Phil Jones about his brutal departure from the Manchester United WhatsApp group.
Here’s a snazzy Nations League preview, with Italy, Germany, Denmark, Portugal, Croatia, France, Spain and the Netherlands vying for the last four.
And Philippe Auclair asks: who will replace Didier Deschamps now all the French coaches have gone?
MEMORY LANE
Jeans and sheux to the fore as England squad members get together with New Order to record the 1990 World Cup single World in Motion. From left, the back row comprises Chris Waddle, Steve McMahon, John Barnes, MC Peter Beardsley, Des Walker, Gillian Gilbert (keyboardist and guitarist) and Stephen Morris (drummer). From left in front, we have Peter Hook (bass and vocals), Keith Allen (vocals), Tony Wilson and David Bloomfield (FA press officer).
